The Objects of my Affection

Out and about I see babies with their ‘attachment objects’ – blankie’s galore, sometimes a soft toy such as a nice fluffy bear or a silky blue bunny with a satin bow. These meet with my general approval. Though my older son never had any such object, I used to watch his friends calm down froma  frenzy snuggling to a toy or chewing on a ‘lovey’ as they call it in the US. 

I have been a slow warmer to the lovey concept. It seemed like such a crutch to me. But after three years of seeing lovey’s in action with various friends, I was a believer. Since I never used a paci for the baby, the prospect of having something to give him to instantly calm him was something I was looking forward to.

And so, right around the age he should the baby has developed ‘attachment’ towards some objects. The first object of his choice is my bunch of keys. Understandable. This is something Mom has been carrying around to various places, jingling, jangling, swinging since he was born. She has even, in desperate times, used it to distract and entertain. This has created its own problem – I shamelessly use my keys to distract him as I strap him into the car seat, but am then subjected to abject crying as I actually start driving the car (for this I need my keys :)). I also drop my keys in random places (I am a chronic dropper) and am so very cagey with letting the baby suck on it.

So I was waiting for something else, and it came in the form of the plastic cap of my red water bottle. Another object mom uses a lot, but because of sharp, jagged edges, and plain hardness, is totally unsuitable as a ‘lovey’. How he got this one I dont know, as though he has seen me use it, he has never really played with it till he started calling for it, and then crying for it, and then we discovered that if he holds it in his hand, sleep comes sooner and easier.

Alas for mom, these are none of the beautiful, soft objects I can carry and toss around. But, by now I know, thats how my baby is and will be – his own little atypical person.

Last 5 posts by Khushi



5 Comments

  1. Asha

    Good one. I think confort objects are OK, relief for mom

  2. mahi

    Khushi – I also tried to have my son get attached to a “lovey” since I had seen how a favorite blanket worked instantly to calm several of our frineds’ kids. However so far he has not formed any particular attachment to any blankets, soft toys etc. The only “lovey” I can think of in his case are my fingers. If he can play with those while trying to fall asleep, he falls asleep much faster.

  3. Anonymous

    A good post. My son had never shown any attachment to lovey objects but off late he insists on carrying some of his favorite books and puzzles. So I’ve created a bag which is just big enough to hold two story books and one jigsaw puzzle.

  4. Indrani

    A good post. My son had never shown any attachment to lovey objects but off late he insists on carrying some of his favorite books and puzzles. So I’ve created a bag which is just big enough to hold two story books and one jigsaw puzzle.

Leave a Reply